Who says you can’t change your mind? Who says you can’t cook a big meal, then decide to eat cereal? Who says you can’t get all the way there, then go back home to change your outfit? Who says you can’t decide to name your cat Oliver, then Pascal, then Pickle, then Lucky? Who says you can’t decide to have your wedding in Colorado, then six months beforehand, move it to Chicago?

Um…..what was that last one again?

Yup, that’s what I did. I had my entire Steamboat Colorado mountain wedding all planned out. We had the ceremony site, the reception venue, even the rehearsal dinner location all reserved. We had contacted florists, photographers, wedding bands, and wedding coordinators. We signed contracts and put down deposits.  We flew out there for the weekend to meet with the wedding planners, and even have another trip planned in a couple of weeks. It was all going to be perfect.

But then I changed my mind.

You see, it took a trip home for the Thanksgiving holiday for me to realize something very important- this wedding is not just about me and Benjamin (finally) tying the knot. And when I went home I was finally able to grasp something that I hadn’t been able to before; my parents just weren’t that into it.  I know they were trying to be excited, but Colorado is far and unfamiliar to them. Plus, with economic times being how they are, it wasn’t looking like many of their friends were going to be able to make the trek out west. Steamboat isn’t exactly the easiest place to get to, you know. My extended family wasn’t particularly thrilled about the idea either. One of my cousins is planning a Denver wedding which would mean two trips to Colorado for them, two weekends in a row. Then the icing on the cake came when I discovered that two of my best friends from growing up, both newly pregnant, were likely not going to be able to make the trip either.

So yes I had the perfect dress, the idyllic location and everything else in place, but what would that day mean without my family and friends to share it with?

I finally realized that this day is not just about me and Benjamin. It is about our parents and our siblings; our aunts, uncles and cousins; our friends and everyone else who has touched our lives in meaningful ways. No matter how perfect the day and how perfect the place, it would not be as special without the people who mean the most being there to share in our most important moment.

I wish I could say that my realization was priceless, but actually it cost $4,000.

-Nora