«
»

Who Says You Can't Change Your Mind?

December 9, 2008
posted by Nora | View Comments

Colorado ElopeWho says you can’t change your mind? Who says you can’t cook a big meal, then decide to eat cereal? Who says you can’t get all the way there, then go back home to change your outfit? Who says you can’t decide to name your cat Oliver, then Pascal, then Pickle, then Lucky? Who says you can’t decide to have your wedding in Colorado, then six months beforehand, move it to Chicago?

Um…..what was that last one again?

Yup, that’s what I did. I had my entire Steamboat Colorado mountain wedding all planned out. We had the ceremony site, the reception venue, even the rehearsal dinner location all reserved. We had contacted florists, photographers, wedding bands, and wedding coordinators. We signed contracts and put down deposits.  We flew out there for the weekend to meet with the wedding planners, and even have another trip planned in a couple of weeks. It was all going to be perfect.

But then I changed my mind.

You see, it took a trip home for the Thanksgiving holiday for me to realize something very important- this wedding is not just about me and Benjamin (finally) tying the knot. And when I went home I was finally able to grasp something that I hadn’t been able to before; my parents just weren’t that into it.  I know they were trying to be excited, but Colorado is far and unfamiliar to them. Plus, with economic times being how they are, it wasn’t looking like many of their friends were going to be able to make the trek out west. Steamboat isn’t exactly the easiest place to get to, you know. My extended family wasn’t particularly thrilled about the idea either. One of my cousins is planning a Denver wedding which would mean two trips to Colorado for them, two weekends in a row. Then the icing on the cake came when I discovered that two of my best friends from growing up, both newly pregnant, were likely not going to be able to make the trip either.

So yes I had the perfect dress, the idyllic location and everything else in place, but what would that day mean without my family and friends to share it with?

I finally realized that this day is not just about me and Benjamin. It is about our parents and our siblings; our aunts, uncles and cousins; our friends and everyone else who has touched our lives in meaningful ways. No matter how perfect the day and how perfect the place, it would not be as special without the people who mean the most being there to share in our most important moment.

I wish I could say that my realization was priceless, but actually it cost $4,000.

-Nora

Tags: , , ,

If you're interested in staying up to date with the Sixthman Blog, sign up to receive regular updates via Email or RSS Feed!
This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 9th, 2008 at 6:30 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  • http://sixthman.net Nora

    Ha, I bought a 400 dollar couch with my brother, and then 3 days later decided to move cross country.
    Well done Steve.

  • http://www.BayAreaWeddingReview.com Pol vanRhee

    An expensive realization, but I’ll bet it was worth every penny! It’s funny how many people forget that weddings are not for them. If they were we’d all go to Vegas (or Colorado) and forget about inviting the families, the acquaintances etc.

    Weddings are amazing, beautiful, unforgettable, but also a major hurdle that you must pass in front of everyone (almost half you don’t know). If you do you know that you have passed the most stressful thing (together) that you can. It’s a good test of a relationship.

    And the photos (no matter where you have it) of all the people you have there and of each other are priceless.

  • Jill Mac

    Rhett and I did the same thing but opposite. We were supposed to marry in our college “hometown” (where we met), which was a handy location for all our friends and family. But when we visited all of the possible venues, we realized that as a couple we had outgrown them. So six months out, we moved the wedding to just outside of Asheville and endured a little bit of grief from the family and the pals. But once we secured some sweet accommodations at a killer rate for everyone, it turned into a giant friends and family vacation that everybody still talks about to this day. The giant tubs of beer we bought helped alot too.

    I always say to engaged couples – do whatever it is you feel will make the day into what you always hoped it would be. Whether that means moving locations to accommodate more people or running off to Vegas with Elvis and Marilyn as your witnesses, it’s your day and your new life together. It should start the way you want it to and the way that feels right.

blog comments powered by Disqus