I’ve been faced with a lot of decisions lately — running the gamut between important, trivial, big and small — which is not a position I generally like to be in. I tend to try to outsmart whatever it is I am dealing with and poke holes in every possible solution, which consumes quite a bit of energy. Most often, however, I end up not paying attention to a lick of it and instead fly by the seat of my pants, hoping I won’t have to tell myself, “I told you so.” Fortunately, this method seems to work out more often than not, and without too much thought, I am on to the next thing.

I took a road trip last week, (that is what you are supposed to do when there is no gas, right?) which is when I usually catch up on my podcasts and audiobooks. It really makes time fly. There was one in particular, an episode of NPR Chicago’s “This American Life”, that got me thinking a little more about what, exactly, is running this decision-making machine inside me. The piece was about break-ups, and the contradictory state you’re thrown into when faced with one. Your head dictates, “you’re better off,” and “it’s the best thing for everyone”, while your heart is ready to tell your head to “go screw itself, there is no way I am better off, this is the worst thing in the history to ever happen.” I haven’t been through a break-up recently, but I realized it is that conflict between my head and my heart that is behind the back-and-forths of every single decision I make.

Since listening to this podcast, I have been thinking about my past choices, trying to divide them between the two columns, to see which would be more stacked – head or heart? If you would have asked me that question 2 weeks ago, I would have said head, hands down, with no hesitation. I’ve always fancied myself a thinker, one who shields themselves from the potentially hazardous situations a heart can put you in. But in the end, I realized that this little blood-pumper is just as independent and stubborn as I am, and it usually gets its way — despite how hard my head tries to stop it.

In the midst of all this, I remembered reading a letter that Thomas Jefferson once wrote to a woman he met in Paris, which chronicled a direct dialogue between his head and his heart. I looked it up and re-read it, and found it so interesting (albeit long) once again.Upon the discovery that my heart is running the show here, I became fearful that I wasn’t always making the best choices. (So fearful, in fact, that it is currently 3:18 a.m., and I am up because I couldn’t quit thinking about it.) But, in his letter, Jefferson implies that “the concessions that the head makes to the heart are the source of some of our most important moral victories”* — which makes me feel a lot better. He was a pretty smart guy. 

Go with your heart!

- Ashley    

*From the book, Philanthropy: Voluntary Action for the Public Good, by Robert L. Payton

My last name is Levine and my Father is Jewish.  My mom is Irish Catholic and my twin brother and I were raised Catholic.  We attended Catholic school from 3rd grade through high school answering to “Lev-I-ne” phonetically.  Besides benefiting from always having school holidays, we had the privilege of experiencing both religions growing up.

Fast forward to the fall of 2000 where I have recently married a Christian woman and she is running errands on a September afternoon.  She comes home and asks me, “Why is everyone wishing me a Happy New Year today?”  I scratched my head for a second and then remembered that it was Rosh Hashana.  We had a good laugh!

Now here I am in the throws of the music and travel industries with a last name like a lot of people in this business.  Sometimes I can explain the entire story and sometimes I just say Happy New Year because after all, its fun to say.

So Happy New Year!

Music, how do you do it?

Today, as I drove down the street on my way to work, I put my iPod on shuffle. “Endless Summer” by Zwan came on, and immediately I was brought back to the Summer after my junior year of college. Instead of driving down a highway, I’m in the Pump House Surf Shop on Cape Cod, MA talking with the owner Matt about what kind of board to buy for the summer. Zwan comes on, and I immediately recognize Billy Corgan’s distinct voice come over the house speakers. The side project was short lived, and had very little success, but this particular song resonated with me. Now, every time I hear that beginning riff, I can see the surfshop, I can feel the fiberglass on a new longboard, and I can smell the freshly waxed boards, ready to go out on the ocean.

Later on in my work day, the shuffle brings me to Third Eye Blind’s “Darkness.” Once again, I’m transported from behind my desk in Atlanta, to behind the wheel of my black ‘92 GMC Jimmy (this car was so old and beat up that when it finally needed repairs, we sold it for parts instead). It’s the summer after my junior year of high school, and I’m driving down Route 6 towards Sandwich Downs. I have a trunk full of tennis balls and racqets, and I’m going to teach the kids of some family friends how to play. I can see the inside of my car, and I can TASTE (yeah, how crazy is that) the Snapple Fire drink that I have in my hand. I don’t even think they make this stuff anymore; I check every grocery store and every convenience store hoping that somebody would have one left. I don’t care if its from 2003, I’ll still drink it. Dragonfruit can’t go bad, it’s made out of dragons, right? That’s not healthy.

These are two examples of hundreds. Guster’s “Homecoming King” puts me at the high school soccer field during the fall of my senior year; the temperature dropping as the sun goes down and the smell of Fall gives way to Winter. Collective Soul’s “Dandy Life” puts me on the bus driving home at night from an away JV basketball game, snow falling outside and everybody asleep. Kenny Chesney’s “Anything But Mine” (shut up) sends me out to San Diego on a Monday afternoon, where I’d walk Crystal Pier in Pacific Beach and then along the shore, people-watching, wave-scouting, and wondering how I was going to survive on the West Coast.

Although everybody else might not have memories as vivid as this (my mind chooses to remember the most minuscule of details for certain things), you can surely associate a song or two with a single moment in your life. Good or bad, these associations happen subconsciously, triggering a memory months down the road, and then stay with you forever.

Let’s hear your stories, they better be good!

-Steve

This Saturday will be my fifth year wedding anniversary.  My husband, Rhett, and I have a long, varied history.  I won’t go into the minor details, but the basic gist is this:  best friends for four years, dating for four and a half years, married for five.  You know it was a long time coming when most people’s reaction to our engagement was not “Congratulations!”  It was “Thank God.  It’s about time.” I have to say, we have a pretty good thing going.  I think I’ll keep him. 

Knowing each other for so long has some advantages.  For instance, we have a certain telepathy when it comes to each other.  He knows that when we’re out and it’s getting late, that when I walk up and put my head against his shoulder that means I’m ready to go…right now.   And I know the shuffle in his feet when my super-social husband has been hijacked by a close talker (or just a talker in general) and needs to be rescued.

We also know every person that the other ever dated so there is never that awkward moment in a relationship where you find out that the nice woman/man you were just talking with, once hooked up with your significant other.  Although there can be a disadvantage there too.  That guy I dated before Rhett?  Please don’t bring that up.  The one name that will start a fight every time?  Rebecca…the heifer.  At least that’s what I call her.

Another disadvantage?  You start running out of ideas.  With a new house, a baby on the way and life in general our five year just snuck up on us and we have no idea what to do this year.

We love to travel and since with Sixthman we see plenty of tropical locales, the original plan was that we would go to Europe.  But like I said, we just a bought a house, so a trip to Europe would mean missing a couple of mortgage payments and I hear that’s not a good thing to do.

We also love being outdoors.  On past anniversaries (and birthdays) we’ve gone on hiking trips, kayaked, tubed, white-water rafted….but my third trimester is looming in a couple of weeks and even walking the steps in the big yellow house is becoming a challenge, so I think rowing would kill me.

So besides a nice dinner, what’s a couple to do?  I need some help Sixthman folks.  Any ideas on something romantic, fun and not too pricey that will make our fifth anniversary one to remember?  I’ll take all the help I can get!

PS: I know that’s not a wedding picture up there but I forgot to bring one.  I’ll get one up there tomorrow.

Its funny sometimes how the little people in your life can give you the most inspiration and can trigger some of the deepest thoughts.

My little person of note today is my younger brother Jack, who at 14, is technically not ‘little’ at all, and in fact is a good 2 inches taller than me and never lets me forget it.

I had the chance to hang with both my little brothers this past Saturday night, as we sent our parents off for a night away.  As always, the time the three of us spent together was full of football (watching and playing), studying (them, with my help), eating (everything they aren’t supposed to), and dancing (living room dance party).  On Sunday, when my parents got back home and I took off to my place, I had no idea that I had taken away from the time spent a very key, and insightful comment from Jack.

As we were watching our younger brother, Charlie, play his football game, Jack and I were talked about school for him, work for me, girls for him, guys for me, health for him, a new house for me, and other things.  He asked me in the middle of our conversation about why I thought things just ‘keep working out for me’.  I laughed lightly, and shrugged, and simple said, “Well, I guess im just lucky.”

Then, not even meaning to, he laughed lighting back, and shrugged, saying ‘april, you aren’t lucky, you’re blessed!’

Since then, I have heard the the ‘luck’ term 5 times of note. And I have thought to myself… its not luck, it’s a blessing.  Have any of you thought of yourself as lucky lately? Try thinking of yourself as blessed instead and see if it impacts you as it has me.

-Ape

I embarked on a vacation with just my father for the first time in my life last night.  We met in New York and flew to Ireland for 5 days of golf, sight seeing and hopefully some deep conversation.  When I woke up on the plane,  I saw the sun rising over the Irish coast thru the pane window and it was the moment I had been looking for to signify that we were on vacation.  Now that we have figured out how to navigate the left lane in a stick shift car  and gotten a little nap in, I am scared.  For some reason it’s easier for me to plan a vacation and get excited to interact with 2,500 strangers than my dad.  We are close and good friends but I have anxiety about being alone with him.

Can someone help me by sharing some experiences that might help me ease into this week and make this the most amazing vacation for both of us?  We both know our lives probably wont allow us this opportunity again for a long, long time.

-Andy

I became a programmer because my creative skills were… well, lacking – so as painful as this may be, please bear with me. I’m the new guy here at Sixthman. Contrary to popular belief, my job is to ensure Joy is in a constant state of ecstasy. Writing software and assisting Peter is a secondary task. Joking aside, I’m excited about this new chapter in my career. Working for Sixthman so far has been a dream. Lake day was amazing, and I’ve learned working hard and playing hard aren’t mutually exclusive.

Fortunately you don’t have much of a bio to write about when you only have 17 years of experience under your belt, so this post should be brief. My name is Michael Ruddy (my friends just call me Ruddy) and I recently graduated from Faith Academy high school. It’s a place where teenagers go so they can graduate regardless of their cognitive abilities. I finished in the upper half of my class, thank you very much.

As you may know, I’m a staunch Libertarian. If I haven’t tried to impose my political views on you already, don’t worry, I will. Please don’t take it the wrong way; I’m just trying to be informative. If mainstream won’t tell you the truth, I will! If anyone wants to talk about econ, government, or anything else, drop me a line (Michael at Sixthman.net).

My hobbies also include computer games, jogging, and hibernating. If I’m not gaming, jogging, or working, I’m probably asleep.. Except for driving, I’m half awake then… I think that just about wraps up my life story (in 4 paragraphs, I know, it’s sad). If there’s any dire details that you want to know, you can shoot me an email, or just leave a comment.

-Mike

It’s 1:30am.  I’m channel surfing and I come to a channel playing a song.  I’m instantly whisked back to the late 70’s, in my childhood living room singing Cold as Ice by Foreigner into a rolled up newspaper.

Yes, an infomercial for the ultimate soft rock hits of the 70’s.  The marketing department for this company is genius.  They played on my late-night fatigue, and my emotional connection to the past that is so easily tapped into through music.  I am an extremely sentimental person, so most songs I grew up on have one memory or another attached to them.

For example, Reminiscing by Little River Band makes me think of laying in the dentist chair (age 5 or 6) looking up the dentist’s nose.  I can remember how the room smelled, the sounds, the sink that we used to have to spit into back in the day.

Biggest Part of Me by Ambrosia takes me back to The Rollerama in Brighton, Michigan.  I would skate in circles for hours in my boot skates with the big orange rubber toe stoppers, just waiting for a song like this to play so I could slow skate hand-in-hand with one of the older 5th grade boys.  Or how about Rich Girl by Hall & Oates?  I remember how that song always made me giggle as little girls do, because it had the “B-word” in it.

There are so many others.  Needless to say, I ended up ordering the CD collection.  I don’t even know how many songs I have or how many more months I have to pay $29.95.  But each time I hit play and hear a song that I haven’t heard in years, I am filled with a feeling from my youth that just makes me……happy!

Do you have a song that revives happy memories from all 5 senses?

~Michelle

No, not a baby, a new kitten! And he’s so cute I just had to share. My husband and I have our furry little family of two dogs and until recently, two cats. I’d had one of the cats since I was 18 and he’d been a part of my life as I moved through 3 states, went through college, had boyfriends and break-ups and eventually marriage, we’d been through everything really. 3 months ago Big Fat was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He died less than 3 weeks later. I was destroyed. I actually wrote a blog around then, and it took 17 drafts because all I could think about was losing Big Fat, and that would have been a really depressing blog.

But now, we have a happy addition!

Our remaining cat, Stinky (yes, I know I shouldn’t be allowed to name animals) was so lonely being the only kitty. If you’re not an animal person, that probably sounds a bit nuts, but he’d never known a life without Big Fat. Stinky became so needy and codependent that we knew he needed a buddy, and after a few months, we were ready too. So, meet L.T. He’s tiny, he’s adorable, he’s a terror.

In the two days we’ve had L.T. we’ve already had adventures. He’s puffed up at the dogs and attacked our 85 lb rotty/lab mix, jumped head first into a bowl of pasta before tracking sauce across work papers, and come to work with me at Sixthman. I have to say, if ever you find yourself stressed at work, “kitten time” works wonders. I’ve never had so many visitors in one day.

I encourage everyone to adopt a dog or cat, and if you have one PLEASE have them spayed or neutered! L.T. and his siblings were unwanted and dumped at a local coffee shop. They were luckier than most and rescued, but not all are so lucky. There are millions of homeless animals with plenty of love to give, just like L.T.

-Laura

 ….and all through the town, the emails and texts were making them frown.  It had been on the calendar for many weeks and hours but “Mother Nature” was saying “there will be lightning and showers”.  So I made the decision to cancel the boating…the floating, liver coating and vans for our toting.  A new date would be set for our last summer spree as the pressure is rising for our coming time at sea.

When I woke up this morning and saw blue in the sky, I said to myself, “lets give it a try”.  I made a few calls to see who was awake…and willing and able to go to the lake.  In just a few minutes, the band was back together…nothing would keep Sixthman from taking this weather.

We dropped down the anchor just before noon, it was five o’clock somewhere, so we cranked up the toons.  It was an afternoon of tubing, wakeboarding and waverunning, swimming, sipping, flipping and sunning.

When the Sixthman team wakes up in the morning on Tuesday, aching and sore from our 2nd great “Lake Day”.  May the snapshots of backflips and wardrobe malfunction…remind them their team has no shortage of gumption.

So hats off to Kelly for setting the stage for two dozen grown ups to NOT act their age.

-Andy